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With gratitude and a full stomach, I had my final chemotherapy session this week. My plan was to finish this last chemo session with Char Kway Teow. But the Zion Road Char Kway Teow hawker closed his stall to attend his daughter’s graduation.

I did have a ducklicious equivalent- Kam’s Roast, the Michelin Starred restaurant from Hong Kong which recently opened in Singapore. Kam’s Roast is founded by a 3rd generation family member of the famed Yung Ke Goose in Hong Kong.

Thanks to Ben who has been catering to my food cravings during every chemo session – starting from chicken rice, moving onto Teochew mee kiah and then Zion Road Char Kwayteow by chemo session 5.

I should qualify that my diet has improved in healthiness by leaps and bounds since the breast cancer diagnosis on 1st June. I’ve endeavored to eat one course of fish and two courses of vegetables every day as well as cutting off sugar. But you can’t take Singaporean food from a Singaporean. So I have my occasional indulgences. And what better time than during chemo when all those drugs are being pumped in to whack out the bad stuff in the body?

My oncologist is continuing me on 3-weekly antibodies injections for another 7 months. I’ve completed 5 months of these injections to date, which were done together with chemotherapy. I’ll also be on 3-monthly injections to take me to early menopause. The analysis of the tumour had shown it to be triple positive (progesterone+, estrogen+ and HER2+). In my layman’s speak, my body is too hormonally active and my oncologist is taming the hormones down several notches.

Since these aren’t as potent as the chemo drugs, I look forward to returning to normal routine. I should say ‘new normal’ because these few months have been life-changing and has altered some of my perspectives on life.

It’s been a long 6 months since I was first diagnosed with breast cancer on 1st June this year. As I count my blessings, I am especially grateful for family and friends who have supported and encouraged me through this journey:

  • Many friends who have been receiving my whatsapp prayer updates and prayed for me as well as other friends who checked in on me over the months
  • My parents who have helped with ferrying Caleb to Kindy and his other activities.
  • Ben who has accompanied me for all my doctor visits and sat through every 5-hour chemo/antibodies treatment with me

I know it is only by God’s grace that I have sustained through this wilderness period. The joy of the Lord has been my strength.

I had originally planned my Tibby & Scaredy Snout and Benji, Yumi, Origami! double book launch cum celebration party on the weekend after my final chemo cycle. But the chemo cycle was delayed 3 weeks till after the party. My friend Bernice said that was better because I would then be celebrating my healing in faith. And so I did. I thank God that I am well and healed in Jesus’ name.

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“These things I remember, as I pour out my soul: how I would go with the throng and lead them in procession to the house of God with glad shouts and songs of praise, a multitude keeping festival”           – Psalms 42: 4

Related posts:

God Knows Leh #5- I ate chicken rice for my first chemotherapy session

Inside-out Kid #2 –It’s not fair, I didn’t want you to be in hospital!

 

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When I was afflicted by a rare voice disorder in end 1998, I grappled hard with a few questions. Why me? Why did this happen? Is God going to heal me? I didn’t know if I was a Christian then. I followed my husband (then boyfriend) to church so I could see him on Sunday mornings and have lunch with him after.

When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, last month, I did not ask “Why me?” because this time, I believe God is for me and not against me.

My key question was “How is God going to heal me?” I believe He will. It was the “how” that I grappled with.

This time, the answers came to me much sooner. Through 3 wise women, a visiting preacher and my breast surgeon A*.

3WiseWomen

On the Sunday before my diagnosis, a visiting preacher came to my church service. He has a gift for healing people of their sicknesses. He said something interesting about that- that he did not know why some people he prayed for healed miraculously and some did not. He just knew that his job was to pray for these people. He also said that God can heal supernaturally as well as through doctors as channels for healing.

When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I approached my pastor and church elders to pray for me that next weekend.

I knew someone personally from my past work life (in senior management) who was healed miraculously. She gave a public testimony to her church congregation of how people prayed over her when she was diagnosed with an unusual tumour. Not long after, someone had an image of a man in shining light reach out to her and remove that tumour from her. She went back to her doctors who found that the tumour was gone! She had been miraculously.

I wanted that miracle.

Two days before my mastectomy surgery, Ben decided that we should go to church to pray before we saw my breast surgeon A*. It was the first time in our lives that we were going to church when there was no church service, programme or meeting.

As we arrived in the carpark, we bumped into our pastor and a church leader leaving for a meeting. They decided to pray for us in this chance encounter. I found out then that my church leader had a double mastectomy 15 years ago. So before Angelina Jolie’s double deed, my church leader did.

Another lady from church (whom I did not know well) visited me in hospital after my surgery to pray for me. She shared that she too underwent a mastectomy.

Together with my friend Theresa, these three wise women’s frank essence in sharing about their mastecs gave me assurance that I wasn’t of lesser faith because I was going for surgery. It was reassurance of the “go” for me surgery-wise.

My final source of assurance came unexpectedly during my final consultation with my breast surgeon pre-surgery. With this question still on mind, I asked my doctor how she thought faith could factor in doctoring and God’s healing.

She shared with me about an overseas patient who came to her with an 8cm tumour jutting out of one breast. It looked really bad. So my doctor’s plan was to use chemotherapy to hopefully shrink the tumour slightly and then remove the entire breast. The patient went through chemotherapy and the tumour shrank to nothing.

A miracle.

The lab report came back with a statement that all the cancer was gone and all that remained was the empty cast that had held the cancer cells. My doctor immediately called the lab to enquire about this strange occurrence. The lab told her, very matter-of-factly, that this was unusual and so they included it in the report.

Another miracle. And there was even medical evidence to support it, with the empty cast as a reminder and proof that she had been fully cleaned out of cancer.

The Christian couple was jubilant to hear this. They left their high-powered jobs, became full time missionaries and planted a church in another country overseas.

All these instances said this to me:

God can heal miraculously.

God can heal through doctors.

God can heal miraculously through doctors.

And I did experience a miracle – I did not experience  any post-operation pain.

God will heal me and is healing me fully even as I go through chemotherapy and post-operation treatment now. The New Testament of the Bible lays out God’s will on healing for me as a believer. My job is to pray and appropriate His promises in the Bible.

Isaiah 55:8-9

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

 

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