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Archive for the ‘God Knows Leh’ Category

Salt quote p3 edited

Salt & Light recently asked me the question, “What does the finished work of the Cross mean to you?”

This question gave me pause to reflect on my personal response in the lead up to Easter week.

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On this Good Friday, I want to pause to thank God for:

— the small voice that prompted me to do a breast self-examination two years ago, leading me to discover a pebble in my left breast

— the review with my breast surgeon this Good Friday week where the scan showed that my reconstructed left breast is all clean, my right breast is also now free of cysts and lumps, and I have cleared the 2-year critical window where recurrence is highest

— family and friends who prayed for me through this time

— Jesus, my Saviour and Healer, who died on the Cross for my sins and sickness so I am made right before God

The diseased left breast that clouded my heart has been cut out and made new. A strengthened breastplate of righteousness covers my heart. My right breast has also been wiped clean.

On this Good Friday, I thank God that the old is gone and the new has come. I am a new creation. My Saviour died so that I can live, scrubbed clean, with a clean breast and a lighter heart.

 

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source: techavy.com

 

 

 

 

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On this eve of Christmas eve, I want to slow down from the busyness of the past few months to look back and reflect on God’s goodness in this year that is passing.

I thank God…

  1. That I am well and healed, and for the completion of 1 year of antibodies HER2 treatment.
  2. That I have a new crown – not of diamonds and gems – but of the hair-raising kind. When I lost all my hair last year to chemotherapy (and that included eyelashes and eyebrows), I seriously wondered if I would actually remain bald from all the chemicals pumped into my body in the past year.
  3. For two amazing overseas trips this year, where we had quiet family time in March and spent time with another family in September (very providentially and unplanned). I am thankful for that new and deeper friendship.
  4. For the first 9 months of “forced” break from writing and the next 3 months where I have started finding my writing rhythm slowly and steadily.
  5. For quietness of most of this year to recharge, refresh and renew my perspectives about life, relationships and faith.
  6. For family and friends who have supported and strengthened me in so many ways.
  7. For Christmas. In this time where peace in the world seems so fragile and elusive, I want to remember to look to Christ – our true reason for Christ-mas. (It’s not Claus-mas as Commercialism repackages it to be).

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”           – Isaiah 9:6

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Today is TGFFF Friday – Thank God for Family, Friends & Favour Friday!
I’ve cut back on blogging and social media considerably as writing and publishing commitments start to pile up again in recent weeks.

But with so many good things happening, I need to pause to thank God:

1. Ben & I just celebrated our 19th wedding anniversary! We picked our wedding date in between both our birthdays so there have been many rounds of celebrations. I thank God for Ben and his support both the eventful and mundane chapters of my life. As the saying goes, it has truly been through thick & thin, sick & sin.

2. Ben, Caleb and I recently went on an amazing vacation – our best vacation with Caleb since he was born (not that we took many vacations with him, to begin with). We spent a few days with another family whom we connected with on a deeper level and another few days on our own. It wasn’t exactly relaxing (How do you relax when you have a 6-year old energizer bunny?!) but it was meaningful for us as a family.

3. Towards the end of chemotherapy last year, my doctor found fluid accumulated around my heart, which may have come about from the drugs. Since then, they have been monitoring me with 6-weekly heart echoes over the last 10 months. Following my latest echo and doctor appointment yesterday, I thank God that my heart is all good and we can discontinue the 6-weekly heart checks. My doctor also stretched my medical appointments even further apart so I see lesser and lesser of him.

4. Over the past few weeks, I have started catching small glimpses of the new season before me – both in my personal life and writing life. I am encouraged and also challenged by some of the new opportunities ahead.

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy and with song, I praise Him – Psalms 28:7

 

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This has been a nostalgic period where curtains have closed, torches have passed and some of us open new chapters in our lives.

Raffles Hotel, flagship of Raffles Hotels & Resorts, the company where I previous worked for a decade, recently closed for major refurbishment under its new owner.

Over 25 of us, including three of our former company’s past-presidents plus old-timers like myself, gathered for Someone’s birthday dinner-cum-reunion at Raffles Grill to bid our farewell to the grand old dame. It was an evening that harked back to my fine-dining days working in the hotel industry.

 

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I got the waiter to take a long shot from my end

 

After a decade of working and growing up with the Raffles hotel group, I symbolically (and quite literally) crossed the road (Victoria Street to be exact) to Central Library, my new haunt since I found my voice as an author. 

I went from corporate suit and lobster lunches at Raffles Hotel’s Empire Cafe to sandals and cheeseburger at Hanis Cafe at the Central Library building. And I have been perfectly happy with my change in diet.

In this 10th year as an author, I bid a second farewell, on the Book Council front. Mr Rama, head honcho of our Singapore Book Council for several decades (and Founder of the Asian Festival of Children’s Content) has just retired. 

As a passionate books advocate, Mr Rama has brought the industry forward by leaps and bounds. He has also been significant in kick starting my writing life, from the time I became a winner of the Book Council’s First Time Writers Publishing Initiative 10 years back. 

So, of course, we had to catch up over kopi. Actually, kopi-kosong for him and teh siu tai & mee siam for me.

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I also start a new page this month, after closing the chapter on 1 year’s cycle of antibodies infusion, on top of chemotherapy and breast cancer mastectomy & reconstructive surgery last year.

It’s a new chapter, a clean breast and a stronger stomach (flatter too…thanks to the stomach fat used for breast reconstruction). I am, figuratively speaking, a new creation in Christ! And I look forward to scribing new words with a higher purpose and heart impact.

And another kopi session with Mr Rama 😄.

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Today marked the last of my antibodies cocktail of Herceptin and Pertuzameb. It’s been 18 three-weekly cycles of 90-minute infusions over the past 1 year. I checked off that final jab with Yakun toast and teh siu tai.

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Now, I am down to daily Tamoxifen tablets and 3-monthly Lucrin injections over the next 5 years. The Lucrin injection is a simple procedure which takes under 5 minutes at the clinic.  That means I see less of the oncology clinic walls (and my doctor) going forward!

Whilst I marked today with a celebratory mood, I was reminded that there are others going through tougher journeys. The lady in the seat directly opposite me today had a severe allergic reaction after taking a pre-chemo medication meant to settle her tummy. The nurses hadn’t even started her on chemotherapy yet. There was a huge flurry of activity as the doctor and nurses rushed her to the ICU upstairs. It was the first time I have seen such a drastic reaction in my 18 sessions at the clinic.

For me, it was a poignant reminder to be thankful for how well I have responded to treatment, and to continually nourish my physical and spiritual health going forward.

 

Psalms 28:7

The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.

Related Posts:

God Knows Leh #18 – Finishing Final Chemotherapy with Char Kway Teow

God Knows Leh #5- I ate chicken rice for my first chemotherapy session

 

 

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Exactly one year ago, on 1st June 2016, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I remember that day in the doctor’s office very vividly.

Before that, cancer was a scary sickness which I would hear about now and then that someone had. Until it hit home. Now, I have become one of those people other people hear about.

How has life changed over the past year? 

Well, my most frequented places have been the doctors’ clinics. 

There was a whole series of tests and scans, followed by surgery and 9 days in hospital. 

Then, it was followed on with 6 cycles of 3-weekly chemotherapy for 4 and half months. 

Thereafter, I have been continuing on 3-weekly Herceptin and Pertuzameb antibody injections. Come July, I will complete 1 year of antibody injections.

I am also on a 3-monthly Lucrin injection to take me to early menopause and daily Tamoxifen tablets for the next 5 years.

In between those, I had 3-6 weekly blood tests, 6-weekly heart scans, a brain scan, lungs scan and another full body scan. Soon, I am up for another mammogram.

In the midst of these, I became acquainted with people around me battling cancer. I got to know two ladies from Ben’s work circles who were diagnosed with breast cancer shortly after my diagnosis. A mum from Caleb’s kindy also got in touch with me to share her recent breast cancer diagnosis. We shared our diagnosis and treatments. I have been praying for all of them as well as for 2 other ladies fighting cancer. 

As I reflect on this year past, I am clear on one thing. I reject cancer and give it no place and no credit in my identity. 

I refuse to call myself a cancer patient. I do not call myself a cancer survivor either. I am simply someone who was diagnosed with breast cancer. I am well now and I will live my life well, without the shadow of cancer obscuring my life lens.

I remind myself that my identity is in Christ. I am a child of God. And that’s where I will fix my eyes on. The right C. The most powerful C. Christ is my answer.

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 Related Posts:

God Knows Leh #2 – I really didn’t want to drink this chemo cup

Inside-out Kid #2 –It’s not fair, I didn’t want you to be in hospital!

 

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